Learning to Feel Pretty

This week I told my husband I wanted to send him a picture because I look pretty. He said that was the first time that he had heard me give myself a compliment since we started dating in 2016. He was so happy! And it made me extra happy. So in honor of that moment I am sharing a picture where the wind is making my shirt hug my soft belly that I am learning to love.

I’ve had people tell me I am beautiful. I’ve had people tell me I’m ugly. I’ve had people encourage me to lose weight. I have had people make me eat because they are afraid I am depriving myself. I’ve had people tell me they wish they had a body like mine. I’ve heard people fat shame others who are much thinner than me.

For some reason, I only took the negative comments as facts. I never let myself believe that I was truly beautiful. If I did feel pretty it was due to make-up or significant weight loss.

Over the past couple of years I have slowly but surely taken a number of small steps to learn self love. I have found that learning to love myself has come down to training my mind to:

  1. Stop judging those around me based on the way they look.
  2. Make my mental health a greater priority.
  3. Stop making what others think about me a priority at all.
  4. Find beautiful qualities in others and magnify them.
  5. Find those same beautiful qualities in myself.

It seems funny to oversimplify these things. But it is really important for me to look back on all of the progress that I have made. It is still more often than I would like that I crumble in self-pity and self-hate. Those small failures are an important part of change, but they do not define me. It is focusing on the small successes and steps I have taken that have helped me to move forward. I am feeling more confident in my body, more love for others, and more beauty in my life than ever before. I can recognize the positive changes in my life and I never want to look back.

In the next few weeks I plan to write more on how I’ve made some of these changes, so stay tuned and feel free to give me any of your thoughts/suggestions/positive vibes. I love talking about these things and learning from others.

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